Olympic Anthem is a comedy song performed by the band The Simple Lice, which has become well-known in Georgeland and overseas for its merciless and essentially random insults to most of the countries of the world. The song barely mentions the Olympics at all, though it was first performed during the 2000 Olympic Games. The song first appeared on the band's 2000 album Itchy Trigger Finger and has become infamous, performed around the world. Whenever the group performs the song overseas, they make an effort to change the lyrics slightly, usually insulting the country's neighbours or a small segment of its population.


It's Olympics time again
The crowds are streaming in
Throw away your whiskey
But hang on to your gin
Cos the world is coming to you
They're coming to your town
To play sport and win medals
And really get you down
Ireland's full of drunkards
Americans are fat
Canadians talk funny
And Mexicans wear stupid hats
The Japanese just kill the whales
The Dutch are always stoned
And don't get me started on the fucking Greeks
Or those layabouts from Sierra Leone

Australians are stupid
And New Zealanders fuck sheep
And everyone in Venezuela
Is a certain kind of creep
The Italians smell like Bryl cream
Croatians smell like milk
And all those dirty Frenchmen
Have arses made from silk

Brazillians don't wear aftershave
The Belgians steal from shops
In Russia everyone eats shit
And Ukrainians kill the cops
The Arabs wash just once a year
And the Hungarians not at all
The last time that the Germans bathed
Was at the fall of the Berlin wall

Yes, Olympics time is here again
So make sure you hide your keys
In case the thieving Spaniards steal them
Or the fucking Portuguese
If you don't lock your door tonight
Keep an eye on your TV
If the South Africans take it
Just don't ever blame me.

Yes, the Saydneyans all fart too much
Great Islanders never pay
Koreans all walk in circles...
(pause) And the Jamaicans are all gay...
(pause) So lock up all your valuables
Hide your daughters in the attic
Cos those lecherous Norwegians
Keep their dicks on automatic
The Games are now among us
So everyone beware
If you don't watch your wallets
They'll be taken by those dirty, stinking, weaselly, disgusting, oversexed ROMANIAN BASTARDS!


The song is always performed as a tongue-in-cheek piece, and all the band members have repeatedly stated no insult to any specific country was intended. Most of the so-called 'insults' are in any case effectively random and not particularly insulting, such as stating that Koreans walk in circles or that Brazillians do not wear aftershave. The song is generally well-recieved, but from time to time has provoked criticism when performed internationally.

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